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The first time I saw my husband he was dancing with a girl who looked like Barbie. I thought, “How nice; Ken and Barbie, together at last.” He was suave and too good looking. She was, well, Barbie. You can imagine my surprise when, ten months later, I woke up as his wife.

I’ve learned a few things about marriage and courtship. Here are some of them:

 Relationships can be like houses; some are fixer-uppers and some are nicely landscaped pre-fabricated homes, ready to be occupied.

 In marriage, two halves do not make a whole. Don’t look to someone else to make you feel complete. Do the best to enjoy your life, and as you develop talents in the service of others, you will feel a special satisfaction with yourself.

 When you ride off into the sunset you take your relatives with you.

 A relationship is a sacred trust. You show your depth of integrity in how you treat those closest to you.

 Marriage is much easier when both people feel the same about the most important issues.

 Children are gifts that keep on giving.

 Think not about the type of person you want to marry. Rather, think about the type of marriage you want to have, and then find someone to help you achieve it.

 Warning: If a person doesn’t want to marry you, you don’t want to marry them!

 There is no quality more important in a companion (in my estimation) than the virtue of kindness. It precedes compassion and embraces the imperfect.

o And lastly, if after a long day, your loved one just smiles when he finds you hiding behind the couch with your own pan of brownies, you know you have a winner.

October 28, 2002
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