News

NH Takes a Break

While all of the RC-September and EC students were enjoying their weeks of pi¤a coladas and sun-baked beaches, the men and women of NH suffered through two snowstorms and four midterms, only to learn that two of the tests didn’t even count!

Nevertheless, NH students learned so much, they were eager to share their newly found knowledge with the rest of the outside world during the long weekend, March 16-18. In fact, members of Section H spanned the globe-traveling as far as Europe and

Asia. Here are just a few examples:
In a clear failure to “manage expectations” in his relationship, NH’s Charles Duncan spent most of his break on airplanes flying to and from Tokyo to visit his girlfriend. While sitting in his first class seat (the lucky bastard worked for Continental and kept his flight privileges), he was able to debate the finer points of airplane purchases vs. leases and the proper ways such transactions should appear on income statements with several of the other passengers. Realizing the importance of maximizing the productivity of his 30 hours in Japan, Charles ignored his girlfriend and went from the airport directly to the Toshiba laptop plant, where he was able to produce more than 3000 laptops during his stay. During his stay, his diet consisted exclusively of rice balls from 7-Eleven.
On the other side of the world, Luis Rodriguez-Navarro Oliver was in Barcelona attending a gala dinner hosted by Spain’s King Juan Carlos I. He received a scholarship from the King and delivered the keynote address “Maximizing Storage Bin Usage in Cranberry Processing Plants.”
Back at home, the rest of NH basically relaxed and got drunk. It started on Wednesday with an “Around the World” party at SFP, where participants attempted to maximize their alcohol intake capacity, measured in glasses of Sangria per hour, by minimizing the throughput time per glass. Ever vigilant, however, several NH-ers recovered enough from the drinking to spend a day observing lift line bottlenecks at a Vermont ski resort.
Not to be outdone, our resident Irishman John Travers joined several other NH-ers who claimed to be Irish in a celebration of St. Patrick’s Day. They claim that they were single-handedly responsible for the gaping shortage of Guinness in the local brewery’s supply chain.
After last weekend’s experience, the members of NH are already looking forward to their (late) spring break as another chance to share what they’ve learned with the world. When reached for comment, the world said, “Not again!”

March 26, 2001
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