Well, last week’s Harbus brought you all of the goings on in those other January sections, but since this reporter was still busy drinking at the HBS Show cast party while setting his obnoxious pink socks ablaze as last week’s submission deadline passed, NH will instead stand alone in the spotlight for this issue.
In fact, your correspondent was not the only NH-er marveling at the six-foot ice luge that evening-six others were also members of the cast-more participants than all three other January sections combined! Perhaps the most famous NH-er was everyone’s favorite Japanese Chef Ben E. Hana, also known as Ed Huang, who leapt from obscurity to steal the show with his TOM one-liners. Who knew that our beloved president is also a member of Section H, at least in his heart? His alter ego Matt Clark has recently been seen lounging in the sky deck of Aldrich with a fifth of Wild Turkey in his hand-his comments have actually gotten more coherent!
The characters actually made an encore appearance in Professor Kaufman’s TOM class, demanding that he sever his ties with the Exec Ed program, and that he provide more than ten minutes of class time for guest speakers. Besides the actors, the depth of dancing talent among the men of NH was unparalleled. Ed Han, who is actually a champion swing dancer, was joined by Mike Genstil, Hector Reinoso, and Ming Shu.
Not surprisingly, when Saturday night’s performance rolled around, NH’s performers were emboldened by the deafening roar of their sectionmates. The screaming was so loud that the rest of the sections gave up trying to compete. Gratuitous references from the stage to every section faculty member-two of whom were sitting with the group in the audience-only made the cheers louder. Thanks, H, for all the support!
Another big event was NH’s triumphal victory in the first round of the January cohort’s Harvard Cup-the Paper, Rock, Scissors competition. Lindsey Cigarran won the section competition in a best-of-three rout of Ed Han. In the final at TGIF, she used a well-placed time out for assistance from other sectionmates to devise a winning strategy. She employed an obscure rock feint, followed by a strong scissors maneuver to defeat Section J’s Paul Carter, who was no match for her wily skills. According to Lindsey, it was scissors all the way, “I believe in the power of the slice,” the victor said.
In other news, the class is learning that there are limits to tolerance. We recently made the shocking discovery that sectionmate Nobuko Kobayashi spent last year developing ways for Japanese banks to discriminate against short customers! The answer? Raise the height of the teller counters to get rid of the old people! Who knew that such harshness could come from someone so kind?
All in all, it’s been an eventful month for Section H as they prepare to head into first term exams and the “spring” break. They leave with the knowledge that their section has the best decorations, the best pizza website developers by far, not to mention the best Paper, Rock, Scissors competitor on campus!